I'm back!!

Starting tomorrow I will be taking pictures of my food again.  This keeps me most honest.    I have been on vacation for the last week and a half.  Honestly I never even took my tracker out of my purse... Sad.  I did do quite a bit of running though.  I don't feel good though due to my poor eating.  Keep me honest and keep me motivated. Tomorrow is a new day.

Big girl pants

I'm pulling up my big girl pants and trying to change my attitude.  I think I just needed an attitude adjustment!  It took until Saturday to do it, but I'm not going to dwell on it. I finally got to sleep in Saturday morning - until 9:30!!  Then I ran 5 miles and felt like a million bucks!!  I now I've said this before, but I'll say it again- Sleep does a mind and body good.  Ever since we went camping the kiddo has decided to start his day at 6 am.  He used to sleep until 8:30...  I really like working out before he gets up but once again I need to be flexible because I am a mommy and that isn't going to change any time soon. 

My goal for this week is to only eat at the kitchen table.  Sounds simple right?  I have been paying very close to my habits this past week.  I tend to eat mindlessly when I am stressed, and I never sit down at the table while I am doing it.  That is my goal and to weigh in on thursday.

In other news...My sisters and I started training for a half marathon in October!  Well I should say they started last monday.  I started on Saturday!  I am on it today though, don't you worry.  Today is a cross training day.  I am going to do my Kenpo-X workout from the P-90x dvds.

I am contemplating joining the YMCA again. It is only 1.5 miles from our house and I think it has a lot more things for the kiddo to do now that he is a little bigger.  I think I will go check it out today.  They have a lot of classes like spinning, yoga, pilates, etc...  Plus they have a pool and I'd love to swim laps occasionally.  Just a thought!

Random note : I've discovered that I love sweet potatoes... plain! 

Have a good day!

Caution: not a uplifting post!!

So I've been really struggling this week...  Mentally and physically.  I've been trying to think of a blog post for the last couple days and I've got nothing good to say.  I am not sure why I've been down in the dumps the last couple days.  I haven't tracked a single thing since last wednesday. BOO.  We went camping this last weekend and had an absolute blast.  I didn't eat terribly and I even worked out a couple times!  The problem has been since Sunday.  I am not sure why, but I can't get enough to eat... and it's not good stuff either.  I am getting tired of constantly thinking about food.  It seems to be consuming my life.  Don't get me wrong, I love food and all things about it... I just hate feeling so out of control.  I especially hate that it is controlling my life.  I am sick of basing how good of a time I had on how well I ate.  I was thinking about this the other day and how long I have been like this.  I can even remember on my wedding day saying "It's my wedding - so I can have a piece of cake!"  Seriously? This is really sad that I have to give myself permission to eat "bad things".  I have been reading a book about intuitive eating.  It is about giving up dieting and listening to your body.  It is totally contradictory of doing WW although WW does try to emphasize a lot of the points in the book.  The idea is to give up counting calories, points, etc  and truely listening to your body.  It is about facing your feelings and not using food to cover them up, it is about paying attention to hunger signals, making peace with food, etc...  All of these things are things I need to work on.  I am torn about continuing to pay for WW when I am not being strict with myself.  I am sick of gaining and losing the same few pounds. I am SICK OF BEING FAT.  I know that the only person that can do this for me is ME.  But if I can't seem to do it then what??  I know this post is a downer but this is my place to pout. The other thing that has been on my mind is going back on infertility drugs.  I really want to have another baby.  My plan was to lose weight to see if my periods became regular.  Well they aren't, and I haven't lost enough weight to tell if this will help.  I don't want to have to make this decision.  Drugs or no drugs?  Diet or not to diet?  I'm struggling...

Sigh...

I gained 0.6 lbs this week.  I only worked out twice so I am sure this has a lot to do with it.  I will not be putting my food on here this next week because I will be gone for 4 days.  That is a lot of catch up blogging!  I will be thinking of you guys watching me and will still be tracking.  We are going camping from today until Sunday.  I packed lots of healthy foods and plan to do lots of hiking... Until then....

Today is better..

Breakfast was a bowl of honey nut cheerios with skim milk and a banana. (6 pts)

After breakfast I went for a quick run with the dog and the stroller (20 minutes) before it started to rain. I also did half of a Jillian's 30 day shred workout before my DVD stopped working.  Not a great workout but better than nothing. 

The problem with cereal is that it doesn't last very long.  I was really hungry by 10:30, so I had an early lunch at 11.  It was a ham and cheese sandwich made with a whole wheat Arnold's sandwich thin, 2 oz of ham and a slice of reduced fat provolone cheese. (3 pts) 

I also added tomato, a huge bunch of spring greens and some light mayo. On the side was baby carrots and grapes with a glass of milk. (8 pts)

 
Around 12:30 I was still hungry so I made a smoothie!!
 

Today's smoothie was made of the last of the frozen strawberries that I picked last summer, some fresh pineapple, spinach and 1/2 cup lowfat yogurt.  (3 pts).  I am so excited to pick fresh strawberries very soon.  They are ready here and I am waiting to hear how they are before I go picking.  I plan on stocking up my freezer for smoothies!!!

The kiddo drank about half of it today!

I have to work again tonight so I'll add my dinner after I pack it.

Struggling...

I am struggling a bit these last few days.  It's not that I'm not motivated because I am... it's just that I am tired and don't feel like cooking.  The thing is... I have 2 picky eaters at my house.  The kiddo only eats fruit and lately vegetable soup, and the hubs only eats a handful of things as well.  I am out of ideas of what to make.  I love to cook but I hate when no one appreciates it.  I am sick of making the same things, so I haven't been cooking at all...

Breakfast was an egg sandwich with a banana and milk (9pts)

Lunch was nachos made with tortilla chips, fat free refried beans, a tiny bit of taco meat, reduced fat cheese, tomatos, green onions, lettuce, salsa and reduced fat sour cream along with milk. (9.5 pts)

I stayed away from the cookies today but had some choc and pb chips. (4pts).

Dinner was homemade chicken noodle soup.  It wasn't very good so I only ate a little bit. (1 pt). Then I had a side salad with balsalmic vinegarette drsg and some pineapple and strawberries. (3 pts)

My plan was to work out in the evening, but I was so tired that I went to bed early instead.  I really need to add more workouts into my week. Total points today 26.5.

Sunday was breakfast on the farm!

Sunday morning we went to breakfast on the farm.

http://www.eatlocaldairy.com/DairyFarmBreakfast.aspx

I had a chai tea before we left. (3 pts) I make it with skim milk.

At the farm I ate scrambled eggs, 2 slices of cinnamon bread with butter, a sip of orange juice, and 2 sausage links.  Not the most healthy breakfast, but yummy! (17 pts I estimated)

I also shared some vanilla ice cream with fresh strawberries with the kiddo.

(5 pts)

I ate another cookie when I got home.  Why?  I don't know because they are sitting on the counter. (3 pts).

I worked from 3-11.  Since breakfast was around 11 I didn't eat lunch.

Dinner I made a salad with spring greens, left over bbq chicken, corn, tomatos, reduced fat cheese and topped it with lite ranch dressing.(6 pts).  I also had cottage cheese and an apple (3 pts).

I packed baby carrots but didn't eat them because I was too full.  I had the grapes on the way home. (1 pt)

It was a stressful night at work and I didn't get home until after 1 am.  I ate dinner at 4:30 so I was really hungry.  Along with the grapes I had - you guessed it -a cookie and some baked cheddar snack mix from the vending machine.

I am calculating the points now and could cry.  Why did I do this to myself?  The snack mix was 5 points.  I didn't plan ahead the last two days and it really shows.  I ate 21 flex points today didn't work out.  That is not good. 

Here's what I learned after analyzing this weekend.  Bad choices are made when I don't plan ahead.  I need to write down my food and figure the points before I eat something.  Often the junk isn't worth it.  On Saturday I should've eaten a more protein filled lunch after running to keep me from being hungry.  On Sunday I should've not eaten so much at breakfast.  Especially not the sausage links.  I don't really like breakfast meat and they are 3 points a piece.  Then after I got home from work I should've avoided the kitchen or maybe packed a bigger more filling snack to keep me from eating at home.  I was really tired and stressed from a long night of work.  Any suggestions for things to do other than eating in a situation like this?  It was late and I needed to go to bed, but I need about a half hour to unwind before I crawl under the covers.  What are your ideas?